.jpg)
8 People in the Group Chat
A girl's trip in the Georgia mountains turned into a podcast for two high school friends. Find out how they met and what keeps them connected over 25 years after high school graduation.
8 People in the Group Chat
You Are so Pretty to Be Dark-skinned
It gets real as we delve into a raw discussion on colorism and beauty standards within the black community. From the sting of backhanded compliments to the weight of 'good hair' expectations, we lay bare the personal stories that have shaped our understanding of self-worth.
Then we switch it up with a spirited exchange about the rise of charcuterie boards and muscle car enthusiasts' peculiar road antics. Don't miss out as we also shine a light on Amy Smith, a local realtor, making a splash in Charlotte and Fort Mill. Find Amy on Facebook at Amy Smith Dupree and on Instagram at @asmith_hereforhousing.
I'm Yola Gilliam. I'm your girl, Lene Johnson, AKA Leni. If you've been serious on my other friends, that call me Leni.
Speaker 2:Yo, what's going on? Oh yeah, I have trouble keeping up with the days of the week. I don't know what day of the week it is, Um, but I'm day, I'm day.
Speaker 1:Oh it is, so I'm going to be going to the. I'm day. I'm day, oh it is, so it's been an event for week. We had um both of the boys at home. We've been hanging out watching movies. It's been rainy, we had Christmas, so we wore pajamas for two days straight, which is the highlight. You know, I like to be comfy cozy.
Speaker 2:Yeah. What you been up to we're absolutely nothing, just trying to get things ready for the plays, and I have guests coming in this week for new year's to stay.
Speaker 1:Oh, that'll be fun. How many guests do you have coming, oh?
Speaker 2:just two no that's not too many, no, just two. It just, you know, for rental, that's all. Oh, okay, yeah, just for rental. So I have to get the place ready and so that's what I've been doing, nothing, just chilling and trying to clean and just be out by the time they get here. So that's it. Just like you, comfy and cozy, and you know same thing, my onesie. You know, I love a good onesie. I love a good onesie. What movies were you watching?
Speaker 1:Oh my goodness. So I decided that I wanted to catch up on some things and watch stuff with, like, tia Maury in it for some strange reason. So I did a lot of that. She's got. She's been on the Lifetime making holiday movies, so I watched several of those. Tatiana Ali has several too, so I kind of got in that zone where I was just watching a lot of stuff with black folks in it. I do like black folks at Christmas and you know Kelly Rowland has a series, the married little Christmas series. So I watched all three of those Mostly.
Speaker 1:And we, like, I said Warped pajamas and we ate, and ate, and ate. Eric makes all the good food, and so he had a sit up nicely for Christmas dinner, and so we've been eating on that for a couple of days. What did you have? Oh, he made he fried a turkey. It was a hot honey fried turkey. Oh, he made a ham, mac and cheese, some green beans, some dressing, a couple of cakes I'm missing a couple of tea. He goes all out. Dressing, not stuffing.
Speaker 2:Not stuffing.
Speaker 1:It was not in the bird, it was on its own, uh-huh. Oh, he also made some gum bug.
Speaker 2:Hmm, as you know, people or some of them may or may not know Eric, her husband, is a deaf.
Speaker 1:He is, he is, and we take full advantage of that we enjoy that aspect of his life.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, did you say hot honey turkey?
Speaker 1:Yes, hot honey, deep fried turkey Well that sounds good.
Speaker 2:That sounds so good, but I can't eat turkey.
Speaker 1:Really why I have gout. I do too. That is a weird thing to have in common, so I have to eat it in moderation.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and like I know if I'm going to eat it which I don't eat it that much at all I make sure I have my cherry juice because it will set it off. And so I know when I drink cherry juice it kind of like, uh, I won't have an episode, but I just try to just really limit my gout intake. But that's very weird that, um, that we're so young and we get it. I remember my first fillet rough they said usually old women get it.
Speaker 1:I know my great-grandma was like 90s had it, but yeah, I actually have a prescription for it. What do you take? It begins with an I. I can't remember the whole name I endow something.
Speaker 2:Yeah, my dad used to take that and he no longer takes that anymore. He takes one that starts with an A, but my cousin has it and usually either men or old women get it. So, wow, I didn't know you had gout as well.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I found out because I thought I was dying, my foot was going to fall off, and I went to the emergency room and they were useless. But then I went to my own doctor and she walked me through some things and I learned that some of my like my favorite foods, like the spinach and the brussel sprouts and things like that that I eat a lot oh yeah, exacerbating it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, oh wow. I too found out some years ago. I was still living in Atlanta and on Sunday I remember it was that Sunday I had made turkey necks and because I love a good turkey neck girl.
Speaker 1:That is an old woman thing.
Speaker 2:Oh, turkey necks. Oh, my God, it's so good. Um, I had for breakfast I had like bacon and grits and something I think. For dinner I had like turkey necks. I think I had mac and cheese and you can't remember what else.
Speaker 2:But that day it felt like I had stuck my toe and I kept thinking why did I have to stuck my toe? Um, and then around, I had to say it was around like maybe two o'clock in the morning I went to use the bathroom and I had to walk on the side of my foot. That's how bad it was hurting. I didn't know what was going on.
Speaker 2:By six o'clock, when I used the bathroom again, I literally was crawling, literally was crawling to the bathroom and went to the urgent care and he thought because I had had um bunion surgery when I was in high school, he thought it was because there was a screw still in my foot. So he made a appointment to go for me to go to the orthopedic surgeon and I had told my daddy. He was like it sounds like gout and I'm like in and gout. He was like mm. Okay, because I remember having my cell in vain on it. My foot was. It was first of all was so swollen and the mirror air from the ceiling van and the flat sheet it just so when I went in and not have the sheets on you have got to.
Speaker 1:Just the foot needs to be exposed. Oh my God.
Speaker 2:Touching it, the absolute worst. So by the time I got to the orthopedic surgeon I literally was crawling and they had to come get me with the wheelchair. And so the doctor comes in. He said tell me what you ate yesterday. And I told him he said do you have a history of gout? I just chuckled Because my dad had just told me, like a few hours ago, he thought it was gout and that's when I found out that I had it. And he said you know, you may not have another flare-up for another month, another year, two years. He's like this will probably last for about a week, and after that it was as if there's no sign of it. So I just have to be, we have to be cognizant of what we can. And I don't know. For me it's turkey, so I try to limit that.
Speaker 1:Mind the spinach Beef. And well, see, I would like my favorite meal is like a rib eye with spinach and mushrooms and Brussels sprouts, which all can exacerbate gout, which I did not know, and so, but I do like I would throw for lunch. I'd throw a leg of spinach and a ball with some shrimp, or I'd be like, oh, I'll just make these Brussels sprouts before they go back, and so I eat Brussels sprouts and spinach like two, three times a week each. Thank you, and I learned that when I was looking at the list of foods that I need it to be mindful of, you know, because we all know the beef and those kinds of things. Yeah, but I was not expecting all of my favorite vegetables to be on the list. You have to be mindful of that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's, that's great Like for my dad, I think he he loves sardines. I love sardines too, but he can't have that. And you know, of course they say pork and shellfish will do it. And I have noticed that I'm going to have to start doing a food diary because I have noticed that certain things that I eat, it will almost feel like I have stumped my toe, like the first time I had a flare up. Yeah, I never know what it is, because I'm not writing things down and I'm like, please, Lord, don't let it be seafood, because if I have to give up seafood, that is going to be a sad day.
Speaker 1:A very sad day. I think you have to do it in moderation, like you can't have it all the time, but if you do it in moderation, you should be fine and have to keep that cherry juice on deck because I'm like first turkey, now see Lord.
Speaker 2:So but you know, tatiana Ali has a cute little movie with Pamela Belle.
Speaker 1:Cornelia Smith.
Speaker 2:No, he plays the handsome guy who plays all state guy. What's his name?
Speaker 1:Dennis Hayesburg in Cornelia Smith yes, yes, yes. The one when her sister passes away and she goes, yes.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, that was that. That's a cute little movie that.
Speaker 1:I have seen that one, and I watched that one this year too. Yeah, that was a good one. So you're real, are you right? That's not the one she does with Cornelia. So the one she does with Cornelia Smith, he should not pull in, plays her sister in that one and tip his blood, so isn't. So that's jingle bells. But the one that you're talking about I think maybe it's Andre would feel that.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, yes, yes, he is in that one. Yes, he's in the movie. Yes, yes, that one is. He's been around a long time because, remember, he played Robert.
Speaker 1:That's how I think of him. When I see him, I think Robert.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, classic that he has. He has been around. Wow, you, when you start really digging you see, these actors and actresses have been around a long time, a long, long time.
Speaker 1:But yeah, it's funny because people always make them out to seem like they're just overnight successes and I was like they've been grinding for a while for a while.
Speaker 2:And you know what? There was a guy up till my mother who just passed. Forget his name, hispanic actor. He's such a good actor as well, but I know he played I think he's his original. He starred in originally on, I think, days of our life. I didn't realize he played on that, but I know he was in law and order. Forget his name, I'll get back to you on that one. But he passed away and he was such a good actress. I mean, excuse me, actor. I'm sorry. Yeah, actor, I'll send it to you.
Speaker 1:Because you like to play in law and order and I was like I know she's on my Benjamin Brett.
Speaker 2:No, no, and you know I realized that a lot of you know people don't realize that a lot of actors have been in law and order in actresses.
Speaker 1:Everybody Like I think, anybody who is acting has been on an episode of law and order or an episode of the West Wing.
Speaker 2:My goodness, they really, really have. I literally just sent it to you. It is being delivered to you as we speak.
Speaker 1:Do you remember him? You keep saying as we speak I just got it, I know I don't know him. I think I know him. I sure as heck don't know him from days of our lives or whatnot.
Speaker 2:I wouldn't like to live. It, says one like the one, like his name is Pamara Day Los Reyes. Well, I guess the soul so young, 56.
Speaker 1:Condolences to his family and love.
Speaker 2:I know but yeah, but I'm glad that you were able to spend time with your family.
Speaker 1:I did. I have teenagers, so spend like we watched. I guess we watched a couple things together. We watched me and the youngest one, he's 15. We watched two versions of the Grinch, like the original one, and then the most recent one. I don't do that, jim Carrey one, and then I mean the older one ended up watching the Eddie Murphy candy cane Lane, which was cute. It's a new one, right?
Speaker 2:Yes, it's new this year, because I think that I saw some advertisements for that. Is that on prime? It is it is.
Speaker 1:You can't tell. Quality time is my love language, so anybody who spends time and hangs out with me yeah, it makes me warm and fuzzy.
Speaker 2:Well, so what do we have this week?
Speaker 1:What you got us about to talk about is I'm always nervous at this point, Just like. Well, we're about to talk about now.
Speaker 2:This week I thought we were talking about because my cousin and I had a conversation and we were talking about Hair and color. There was a situation we were talking about and that she said that a gentleman walked up to her friend and said you know, you are so pretty to be dark skin. And I said what did she say? What Did she get offended? And I think she just kind of was like whatever and just kind of like moved on and I said wow, so we got into the. You know, when you start talking about something that snowballs into you know different things. And then we started talking about good hair and quote unquote what that means and that you know it just kind of Hate that term. So I said you know what this will be so good to talk about on the podcast. So have you ever?
Speaker 1:The audacity to say I mean, I guess over these I've been told I was pretty for black girls, pretty for a big girl. I don't know what the qualifies for you either, or you aren't to somebody like you can just say to somebody I think you're pretty and leave it at that. Yeah, you don't need to qualify that as this thing that you evidently don't usually find to be attractive, that they have some kind of way Exceeded your expectations and you feel like they should know it in that way.
Speaker 2:I agree, I agree, I have had that happen to me a lot. Actually, you know, you are so pretty, you're so cute to be a dark skin, to be dark skin Really, I mean and I find that obviously the only people that say that For people in our race. I've never had anybody in another race say that.
Speaker 1:No, I think you're just be pretty as a black girl. Yeah, or just you're just pretty. No, I've never had Well, I've had only one. And I have actually dated some folks outside of my race and I still, which is why I wouldn't date them long With that whole pretty as a black girl say for a black girl thing.
Speaker 2:They said that yes.
Speaker 1:Really, this is like people. They think it is a compliment, but they, what they are telling you is that this is my standard of beauty and some kind of way. You are an exception to that and I need to let you know that you are an exception to the rule.
Speaker 2:Well, now you're, so I just want to make sure that I'm here. You correctly You're saying someone said that you were pre to be a black girl.
Speaker 1:Yes, white men have said that. Wow, Let me say black men might say you were pretty to be dark skinned. But white men will say or not? Black men will say you are pretty for a black girl. I had it said to me. I've had friends who had it said to them. Like I said to me, it just means that they have a, in their mind, a particular standard of beauty. They feel like you are an exception to that and, instead of just letting you know that they find you to be attractive or pretty, they want you to know that, hey, this is my normal standard, but I have singled you out as an exception to that and you should feel good about yourself.
Speaker 2:And that is not okay, people. Okay for anyone to say that to anyone period, that is just a news flash. You don't say that, don't understand where people get off thinking that they can just say crazy stuff like that, like you're just pretty period. Not for a black girl, not for a white girl, not for Hispanic Asian Indian. You're pretty, period, end of story. But I don't think that people really see how offensive that could be.
Speaker 1:But I don't know that it happens to not black women. I think that black women are the ones who get the qualifiers Like you're not. They always want to let you know that you would not normally be seen as this, so people think it is a compliment.
Speaker 2:That ordinarily you, your race of people as a group for females, are not.
Speaker 1:That's what I think. I think they don't think as a whole. Black women are beautiful. So if they are going to tell you that you are beautiful, they want you to know that this is in addition to what the regular standard is.
Speaker 2:But the standard is not beautiful, is not pretty or beautiful for black as a culture I don't think that black women are considered.
Speaker 1:Well, we know that black women are not the, absolutely not, no. And then it becomes you. You said yourself like it becomes. Then the colorism enters the chat with the. You're pretty for dark skin girl.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because they don't look at dark skin to be pretty. No, they don't, or they'll say was she, was she, was she caramel or caramel, or was she? You know, that's what they'll say, which leads me into this. So did you see the reel that I sent to you from YouTube?
Speaker 1:Yes, out the hair. That pissed me off. So not only are we not pretty, but we've all had it too.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So let's give some context to the people who didn't see it, because we'll post it, because I thought it was really good. Hopefully we can post it. So, anyway, the girl comes on and I'm pretty girl, darker skin girl, chocolate girl, and so she says she has long, real long hair and it's gorgeous too, by the way. And the comment was when I look like this, he had perm here. He said no one questioned me, no one ever came up to me and asked me what was I mixed? She said but she is now natural and her hair, she has her natural Toil curly hair, meaning unprocessed, it's not permed, it's just natural. And it's long as to her waist. And she said now that she now, because her hair is long and has her natural curl, she gets all the time what are you mixed with? As if back women get not grow hair. And she said that is very, very offensive. I said that's just. I don't know. I just I just saw her to where I thought the hair was beautiful.
Speaker 1:Her hair was beautiful. It, like you said, it had her natural curl pattern. It was very, it was very long. It is long hair for anybody. It's not just long hair for black women, it is long hair for anybody. It's to her waist, yes, it was to her waist, yes, and she has features that would be considered African features. Like she looks like a black person and, like she said, she was never questioned about her racial makeup or ethnicity prior to wearing her hair this way. When she just wore, you know, shoulder length relaxed. But because it is very long and her curl pattern is phenomenal, folks automatically have decided that there has to be something contributing to that, aside from just the hair growing out of the scalp of this black woman.
Speaker 2:That she has to be miss. She can't just be black, I think. I think I hope I'm not misquoted but I think she said they asked her she mixed with Indian. Yes, I think that's what she said.
Speaker 1:And so you know what I find interesting about that Do you have Indian in your family? I'm using my quote fingers. You've heard that about people with yeah, with their good hair. But I will say this I have often heard that from black people that is not even other races or ethnicities asking that question. So I'm assuming, like when she is saying people are asking this question, it is not just like we want to jump to the conclusion that is just white folks or non black people. But I, when she said that part, my assumption was these are also black people asking her when they're like you got Indian in your family because you got good hair.
Speaker 2:It's just you know what it reminds me of, but I'm sure you haven't heard this, but it's this bit on outcast song, and everybody knows I love outcast, and so it's a bit on there that says she says the guy says oh my God, your hair is so beautiful. And he says she said well, you know, I got Indian in my family. It's hilarious, I literally thought about this. And he said, girl, that ain't no good hair, that's just Hawaiian silky, Hilarious, Hilarious. But yeah, it's not just black people that ask that, but I just. It's so crazy to me that people just think that you have long hair, you have to be mixed with something, or the standard is oh, their hair can grow, and the notion of good hair. So when you hear someone say good hair, what do you think that people assume?
Speaker 1:I assume that people are talking about either straight hair like no kinky no quote, unquote nappy hair You've got either straight hair or you've got like big, luscious, 3c curl type situation. It's like you don't have kinky, coily hair. When they say good hair, they're talking about something that is either straight or with bouncy spirals and curls, and usually there's some length to it, but-.
Speaker 2:And are you thinking that this person is black when they talk about, quote, unquote, good hair.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't think other people talk about good hair. I think it is something a stigma that we have as black people that go along with the colorism that came out of days when people were being forced to have children with slaveholders.
Speaker 2:No, no. My question to you is when they say and I want someone with good hair, do you think that they are talking about someone black? Is what I'm saying. When you hear someone say oh, she has good hair, does your mind automatically think that cannot be talking about someone black, or do you think it's my question?
Speaker 1:I think I'm talking about someone black, because I don't think we think about other people's hair in the same context. I got you, I got you.
Speaker 2:I got you. I see what you're saying. You know I just can, we just so. Does it offend you when someone says good hair?
Speaker 1:Offend is a strong word. I will say this Eric has what would be considered good hair Soft hair, it is soft hair. It is curly, like brown coca-cans. Curly black hair, like the song used to say, like finally easy penis. So I did think about honestly like what kind of hair with my children have if I procreate it with this person and for me I also end up having boys, so it mattered a bit less. But because you're thinking about the manageability of the hair, correct, it's not a good thought to have. But that is some people's reasoning behind wanting their children to have good hair, which means they have to. Then they have to first procreate with somebody who has good hair First time I say good hair, I'm using Air quotes.
Speaker 2:I get you know, we had this, this talk, and I said it's not good hair. Can we just say, ok, well, what would you like? I was like, let's say, soft hair, managerial hair, because I guess for what they call it for seahair, but the coils in the curls are tighter, but I don't necessarily, but my hair is very soft.
Speaker 1:So I think, like you said, is people think of it, they're talking more about manageable hair or hair that is not as tightly curled or coiled.
Speaker 2:Yes, you do. You think about your children. I mean, I can see what you're saying. I think about, you know the your children, because for a girl that would be, and it wasn't a good thought to have by any stretch.
Speaker 1:Well, it is a horrible thing to think, but we have been programmed to think about those things.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I'm sure we probably were younger. I know I used to remember this verbatim. When I was younger I always said I never want to marry anybody black, no one dark skin. Because I'm dark skin Obviously I don't think that way now but because I was teased. So I think when things are said to you, you don't know how triggering it may be to a person, because I was teased a lot.
Speaker 2:Now now, granted, going back and thinking about it, probably those people that teased me, the guys, probably had a crush.
Speaker 2:But you don't think about that when you're a child because you know children can be mean. But I always said, oh, I want to marry someone Puerto Rican or light skin Because you know I never want my, if I have children, want to experience what I experienced when I was younger, being called, just all types of things. Like I remember this guy named Kenny we went to school with would always tease me and oh my and I just remember being in had to be six or seven grade, going to the specific class, because he would just tease me and I just remember saying I never want my children to experience this. So I do not want to marry anyone dark because I don't want my children to come out dark. But here's the catch what that is just because you marry someone who is lighter or someone that's under your business not mean that those genes will not jump back. Exactly so you didn't know this as a child. Now, obviously, I have grown and I don't think that way now. So I love a dark skin guy. I'm going to tell you.
Speaker 1:The thing is I thought that was my type, so I did not marry a dark skin guy, to the point that when I first introduced him to one of my aunts I found out later she asked my daddy if he was Mexican. Really, yes, but he is funny because we have been in places with large you know let's, you know, in Latinx populations and folks have spoken to him and Spanish, because they had some assumptions. But yeah, I was. I was a little bit hesitant I know it sounds weird because I did want to marry somebody dark skin. I was a little bit hesitant to marry, to date, this light skinned person. And so, yeah, it's interesting, those things that we think that we want based on how we've been, you know treated or treated or things that may have happened to you in the past.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I thought that obviously that was very ignorant thinking, but again, I was a child. Of course I do not think that way now, but yeah, it's funny.
Speaker 1:Those genes going to come out and do what those genes going to do, so it won't even matter, absolutely.
Speaker 2:So you know the people who are thinking, if I marry a non black or a lighter skin person, that, oh, my children are going to be. You know, because people automatically think, just being a dark skinned person, because you marry someone white or light or another ethnic group, their children are going to be beautiful. But that does not mean that. That does not mean that Because I've seen it to where it's like, oh girl, but we won't get into that. But I have seen where that was not the case. So you know, just because you think that you may be marrying someone light or white or whatever, does not mean that your children are going to have this quote unquote soft hair. It doesn't necessarily mean they're going to be quote unquote light, Because, again, the genes be your color.
Speaker 1:Yep.
Speaker 2:So they are an amazing thing, they are very much so they just have to break that habit and it's just just very sad what, honestly, slavery has done to the culture of our people.
Speaker 1:It just you know the things, yes, the way that you've you know, you've been manifest that, and there's a lot of like internal colorism, internal racism, that we then decide we're going to try to wipe out by doing things that are not Healthy for us as it comes to terms of relationships, and so we enter into relationships with people we ain't got no business being in trying to combat some feelings that we have internally. Yes, yes.
Speaker 2:And I think that, again, here's where growth can come into play, and also times you do need to go, sit on someone's brown leather couch and, just here, a third party that's unbiased, to talk your feelings out. So go to therapy, people, that's, that's that. Look, that is the moral of the story. Yes, I mean, if you are having, you know you, just thoughts, or sometimes you just need to work out things with the unbiased person, it doesn't, you don't have to be at your wits end, you don't have to be in crisis.
Speaker 1:It's actually pretty good to start there before you're fully in crisis. That way, you have somebody to help you every step of the way you know what Colorism is.
Speaker 2:Just not for darker skin people too, because people have colorism with light, lighter skin. Sometimes they don't know where they fit in. Too light to be white, too light to be fit in with the darker skin. You know, oh, you're not black enough, you're not white enough. I've heard that too. So it doesn't just come in the form of you know, with darker skin. Yeah, I believe in just with black people, because I have heard where there are in the Hispanic culture the lighter, the darker there. So I tell you it has just really done a number on people.
Speaker 1:I think that's another thing. People don't understand that ethnicity and race are two different things. So you can be Hispanic but also be black or be Hispanic and also be white or be Hispanic or be Asian. It's ethnicity and race are two separate things and I think that people have. They look at people who identify as Hispanic or Latinx, and we are so accustomed to seeing folks who actually do Like, if you look at them present as Caucasian and so they have some experiences that darker skinned folks, Hispanic folks, don't have and that you rarely. You rarely see like darker skinned Hispanic folks or darker skinned like Indian people or South Asian folks, without there having to be some conversation around it because they seem to be outside of the norm when they're not. It's just what we see. You know, we always see the fair skin on billboards and in ads and held up as beauty standard of beauty Exactly, Beauty that is true.
Speaker 2:And so again going back to when we were younger and me saying that you know I was teeth, I know a lot of people were, but that just wasn't. You didn't see when you grew up. You didn't see a lot of commercials or people who look like you. Growing up on my now, maybe Jet, ebony Essence, things like that, yeah, but I'm just saying just regular L'Oreal and not mainstream.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you are going to see a lot of us mainstream? No, so of course, when you see, I mean the truth of the matter is it's still today looked at as some kind of anomaly when you see a beautiful, dark skinned woman gracing, you know, the cover of major magazines.
Speaker 2:True facts, true facts. So I just think that everyone, no matter what color you are, needs to be just comfortable with your own skin and whether other people think that you're pretty or handsome, believe that yourself. Yeah, I'm going to tell you somebody who really but I don't know if you follow him, but ham Newton. Huh, well, I tell you, top tier, just confidence in himself, like he is going to root for himself no matter what, that's good, it is great.
Speaker 1:His attire is drip as they say I do too.
Speaker 2:You know, people think that he's very out there.
Speaker 1:Look, hey that just shows you all the problems. Express himself. Let him.
Speaker 2:Exactly. No, I can't, I can't hurt him and yeah, he just exudes confidence, I mean, you know. So, everyone, I just think, just needs to work on themselves and working on being, you know, just secure and having confidence in themselves, because, no matter what people may say about you, you have to fill it within because if you don't, no one else will. So, amen, no, that's, that's, that's my thought on that, that's my thought on that. So good, good, good, good topic. I think that's something that, whether we know it or not, some people may have to do. Yeah, exactly, and unbeknownst to us. People may have been teased or been the bully, but it just it needs to stop, it needs it just just, people, just be very cognizant of what you say to people. Be kind to people. Be kind, which brings us to, which brings us to.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to be kind. I have an internet story.
Speaker 1:Why you have to be kind, because I'm annoyed. That's a pet peeve of mine. So charcuterie, that's what I'm talking about, meaning meats, cold cuts and so people started, you know, having charcuterie. People started having charcuterie boards, and then people started putting every John Brown thing on boards and in the holiday season especially, people started having parties and just if you bring in a platter of food, you just bring in a platter of food. Everything ain't a board. And I saw this video of these lovely ladies having a gathering, okay, and they all seem to have brought, you know, a dish, but they had stuff like popcorn boards and chicken wing boards and doughnut boards, and those are just platters of food Like a one-time board. No, it's just a platter of one-times. You put it on a board, but it just annoys me it does Tell us how you really feel yo.
Speaker 1:This is not like, trust me, nobody should go out and change the fact that they do this just to appease me, but just out of things that I saw scrolling on the internet is last week, which is how we find these things just random stuff that makes us feel some kind of way when we see them. This is true, and this was one of mine. I don't like it. Stop putting everything on boards. It's just a platter of food. If you bring in chicken wings, just bring chicken wings. We don't need a production. It ain't a board. Don't put it on a board because they're just going to fall off the board. Put it in a platter so this food is safe, so you can carry it.
Speaker 2:Well, let's go to Miriam and Webster's definition of what that is.
Speaker 1:I don't care what Miriam says. Shakurda remains cold meat.
Speaker 2:No See, that's what I was going to say. That is what the definition is. First of all, I think what people need to understand is how to pronounce it. Okay, so let the people know. Yep, I agree, let the people know how the correct pronunciation of it.
Speaker 1:I'm not saying I'm saying it right, but I know the word to be charcuterie.
Speaker 2:That is correct. That is correct.
Speaker 1:And the French will be mad at me because I probably still didn't say it right.
Speaker 2:Well, let's see Now, did you hear?
Speaker 1:that? No, I did not hear the pronunciation. Okay, but I'm fine.
Speaker 2:Charcuterie is what she says, and the definition is a delicatessen specializing in dressed meat and meat dishes. So that is what the definition is.
Speaker 1:So you were actually, so just put the rest of your food on a platter and have a good day, and so what you're?
Speaker 2:saying is have a platter party. Is what you're saying?
Speaker 1:You don't need to call it anything Like stop, just bring this food. If you are a signed donor, you don't need to take them and put them on this wooden board so that you can feel like something. And trust me, I love a charcuterie, I love a cheese board, but I'm not putting my chicken wings on a board Like that's a step too far for me.
Speaker 2:Now are you okay with the crackers and the different cheeses?
Speaker 1:Yes, but then that is a charcuterie and cheese board. Once you start adding all the rest of the stuff the cheeses and the fruits and the fresh greens tastes great. That makes a different thing, but still those are the things. If we don't have boards that belong on boards, popcorn does not belong on the board. It's just popcorn, it's just a tray, you just have a platter. But stop with the board parties. People Just like that.
Speaker 2:With the board you motherboard. You heard it.
Speaker 1:Stop with the popcorn, don't let chicken wings, just put them on a platter and bring them to the party.
Speaker 2:Put it on a. She said, put it on a platter and just bring it to the party.
Speaker 1:It don't need a name.
Speaker 2:Do not. She said, put it on a wooden board. Okay, and tell the people that is a charcuterie board.
Speaker 1:That is what she's saying Not a board, don't put it on a wooden platter, just put it in a dish, bring it and bring it. Don't call it anything you can have your food. You don't have to take a picture of your food and you don't have to name your food to be able to eat it Now, does that?
Speaker 2:annoy you when people take pictures of their dishes and put it on Instagram? Does that?
Speaker 1:annoy you. People enjoy their food. They can do that. I don't really care about that.
Speaker 2:I just threw that in, but you don't want them to put it on a wooden board and dim post it as a. That's what you're saying.
Speaker 1:I don't need to be, don't name it. You are not the chef. Don't name the dish, just just eat it. Very unnecessary thing to share with people about my feelings about this, but it was on the internet and I had a lot of strong feelings and I said it to my friends. I said a lot of stuff. So here we are.
Speaker 2:Look, that's how you feel, and it is.
Speaker 1:I have a podcast.
Speaker 2:And you can do that. You can do that Random thought, random thought. Have you ever noticed? And you're going to notice it now? It literally just happened to me last night. This annoys me.
Speaker 2:People who drive Mustangs, challengers, camaro's and Chargers this is for you. Okay, I'm not trying to race you. When I pull up to the light, okay, you know, it just seems like, and just notice this. When you pull up to, you already know when they're revving their engine or if they take off, just know, just turn to your left or your right and notice it's going to be a Mustang, challenger, camaro or charger that thinks you want to race.
Speaker 2:When I pull up to the light, people, and maybe I'm speeding and I come to a stop and I go just a little bit above the line, that does not mean when I pull up beside one of those four cars, that I am at any point trying to race you. Or if I pull off real fast, that does not mean that I'm trying to race you. It just means that I'm trying to get where I am going. Okay, so that does not mean that when I'm sitting in a light beside one of those four cars that I mentioned, that you could just rev, rev, rev your engine like I want to, like, I want to speed pack. I don't, okay, I'm not trying to see, I am just trying to get to where we are, where I'm trying to go, and that's for everyone out there. They're not trying to race you, okay. So you don't have to peel off when the light turns green or think that someone's trying to to race you. Have you noticed that?
Speaker 1:y'all no, I just trying to race me. I drive a minivan, nobody is thinking.
Speaker 2:But I'm just racing them.
Speaker 1:So no, I have not noticed that. I'll pay attention now, but I don't think people think I'm trying to race them in my minivan.
Speaker 2:They, they and this goes out to the only people that are trying to race you or other Mustangs, other chargers, other Camaros and other challengers. Those are the only people that are trying to race. Okay, I'm not, so just stop with the peeling off, all right, that annoys. It literally just happened last night. We'll see, I'm sitting at the light and literally it was raining and they just He'll race it in the rain.
Speaker 2:Racing in the right and I threw my hand up. I said I knew it, it was a dog or challenger. It was a challenger.
Speaker 1:So Okay, challenger Everybody not trying to challenge you.
Speaker 2:Everybody is not trying to. So stop, that's just my. You know my random rent of the day.
Speaker 1:So, folks, whether you want it to or not, you now know a couple of things that annoy us, that are some pet peeves of ours. What are your pet peeves? What are the things that can be rational they can be rational that just really get to you. Tell us about it.
Speaker 2:Tell us, tell us, please, please, please, please, guys you know, let us know. Interact with us. Let us know how you like the show, what we could do better. Tell us about your pet peeves.
Speaker 1:I don't know that I want you out of. Tell me what I can do better. But okay, you think you do everything. I don't think I do everything. Well, but I don't know that I'm quite ready for the criticism of either.
Speaker 2:Okay, well, don't give us criticism. I just get in guys like we can stop you. We can't, we can't, but you know, I just again. I tell you this all the time I love doing this podcast cause you know, you can just talk and we can just talk random things and, you know, share our thoughts about our pet peeves.
Speaker 2:Yeah, when we pull up to the light, the challengers, you know thinking that we're trying to challenge him. You know the charcuterie boards with wings, donuts, that yo. We have found out to them that she, she despises that. So, guys, please don't do that.
Speaker 1:Describes, is the well probably an appropriate word.
Speaker 2:Never mind, yeah, you despise it. Um, but yeah, guys, just let us know how you, how you like the show.
Speaker 1:That's what you're feeling.
Speaker 2:Hit that subscribe button, guys. And so this week we are spotlighting who turn on your notifications.
Speaker 1:Yes, we are spotlighting Amy Smith filter services in Charlotte and Fort meal. Amy Smith to pre on Facebook and a Smith underscore here for housing on IG. Again a Smith underscore here for housing on Instagram, and we'll share all of those in our Instagram and in our show notes so you can be in touch with Amy if you're in Charlotte or Fort meal or Fort meal.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she's doing, she's doing good. He has a little billboard on 77. Go Amy. So Amy, my cousin, is doing big things, Our well bankers. So yeah, check her out again. You know, this is probably one of our favorite segments right it is.
Speaker 1:It is. We know great people doing great things and we wanted to talk about them.
Speaker 2:So check her out again. All of this will be on the site in our show notes and on our Instagram. Again, another great podcast, and, as you know, I love doing this. Love it, love it, love it, love it To subscribe to us and let us know how we're doing, and so we will see you again when yo.
Speaker 1:See you Fridays in the group chat.
Speaker 2:See you in the group chat.
